Friday, December 13, 2019

The Twilight Saga 3 Eclipse Chapter 23. MONSTER Free Essays

WHEN I WOKE UP IN THE MORNING, IT WAS VERY bright – even inside the tent, the sunlight hurt my eyes. And I was sweating, as Jacob had predicted. Jacob was snoring lightly in my ear, his arms still wrapped around me. We will write a custom essay sample on The Twilight Saga 3: Eclipse Chapter 23. MONSTER or any similar topic only for you Order Now I pulled my head away from his feverishly warm chest and felt the sting of the cold morning on my clammy cheek. Jacob sighed in his sleep; his arms tightened unconsciously. I squirmed, unable to loosen his hold, struggling to lift my head enough to see. . . . Edward met my gaze evenly. His expression was calm, but the pain in his eyes was unconcealed. â€Å"Is it any warmer out there?† I whispered. â€Å"Yes. I don’t think the space heater will be necessary today.† I tried to get to the zipper, but I couldn’t free my arms. I strained, fighting against Jacob’s inert strength. Jacob muttered, still fast asleep, his arms constricting again. â€Å"Some help?† I asked quietly. Edward smiled. â€Å"Did you want me to take his arms all the way off?† â€Å"No, thank you. Just get me free. I’m going to get heat stroke.† Edward unzipped the sleeping bag in a swift, abrupt movement. Jacob fell out, his bare back hitting the icy floor of the tent. â€Å"Hey!† he complained, his eyes flying open. Instinctively, he flinched away from the cold, rolling onto me. I gasped as his weight knocked the breath out of me. And then his weight was gone. I felt the impact as Jacob flew into one of the tent poles and the tent shuddered. The growling erupted from all around. Edward was crouching in front of me, and I couldn’t see his face, but the snarls were ripping angrily out of his chest. Jacob was half-crouched, too, his whole body quivering, while growls rumbled through his clenched teeth. Outside the tent, Seth Clearwater’s vicious snarls echoed off the rocks. â€Å"Stop it, stop it!† I yelled, scrambling awkwardly to put myself between them. The space was so small that I didn’t have to stretch far to put one hand on each of their chests. Edward wrapped his hand around my waist, ready to yank me out of the way. â€Å"Stop it, now,† I warned him. Under my touch, Jacob began to calm himself. The shaking slowed, but his teeth were still bared, his eyes furiously focused on Edward. Seth continued to growl, a long unbroken sound, a violent background to the sudden silence in the tent. â€Å"Jacob?† I asked, waiting until he finally dropped his glare to look at me. â€Å"Are you hurt?† â€Å"Of course not!† he hissed. I turned to Edward. He was looking at me, his expression hard and angry. â€Å"That wasn’t nice. You should say sorry.† His eyes widened in disgust. â€Å"You must be joking – he was crushing you!† â€Å"Because you dumped him on the floor! He didn’t do it on purpose, and he didn’t hurt me.† Edward groaned, revolted. Slowly, he looked up to glare at Jacob with hostile eyes. â€Å"My apologies, dog.† â€Å"No harm done,† Jacob said, a taunting edge to his voice. It was still cold, though not as cold as it had been. I curled my arms around my chest. â€Å"Here,† Edward said, calm again. He took the parka off the floor and wrapped it over the top of my coat. â€Å"That’s Jacob’s,† I objected. â€Å"Jacob has a fur coat,† Edward hinted. â€Å"I’ll just use the sleeping bag again, if you don’t mind.† Jacob ignored him, climbing around us and sliding into the down bag. â€Å"I wasn’t quite ready to wake up. That wasn’t the best night’s sleep I ever had.† â€Å"It was your idea,† Edward said impassively. Jacob was curled up, his eyes already closed. He yawned. â€Å"I didn’t say it wasn’t the best night I’ve ever spent. Just that I didn’t get a lot of sleep. I thought Bella was never going to shut up.† I winced, wondering what might have come out of my mouth in my sleep. The possibilities were horrifying. â€Å"I’m glad you enjoyed yourself,† Edward murmured. Jacob’s dark eyes fluttered open. â€Å"Didn’t you have a nice night, then?† he asked, smug. â€Å"It wasn’t the worst night of my life.† â€Å"Did it make the top ten?† Jacob asked with perverse enjoyment. â€Å"Possibly.† Jacob smiled and closed his eyes. â€Å"But,† Edward went on, â€Å"if I had been able to take your place last night, it would not have made the top ten of the best nights of my life. Dream about that.† Jacob’s eyes opened into a glare. He sat up stiffly, his shoulders tense. â€Å"You know what? I think it’s too crowded in here.† â€Å"I couldn’t agree more.† I elbowed Edward in the ribs – probably giving myself a bruise. â€Å"Guess I’ll catch up on my sleep later, then.† Jacob made a face. â€Å"I need to talk to Sam anyway.† He rolled to his knees and grabbed the door’s zipper. Pain crackled down my spine and lodged in my stomach as I abruptly realized that this could be the last time I would see him. He was going back to Sam, back to fight the horde of bloodthirsty newborn vampires. â€Å"Jake, wait -† I reached after him, my hand sliding down his arm. He jerked his arm away before my fingers could find purchase. â€Å"Please, Jake? Won’t you stay?† â€Å"No.† The word was hard and cold. I knew my face gave away my pain, because he exhaled and half a smile softened his expression. â€Å"Don’t worry about me, Bells. I’ll be fine, just like I always am.† He forced a laugh. â€Å"‘Sides, you think I’m going to let Seth go in my place – have all the fun and steal all the glory? Right.† He snorted. â€Å"Be careful -â€Å" He shoved out of the tent before I could finish. â€Å"Give it a rest, Bella,† I heard him mutter as he re-zipped the door. I listened for the sound of his retreating footsteps, but it was perfectly still. No more wind. I could hear morning birdsong far away on the mountain, and nothing else. Jacob moved in silence now. I huddled in my coats, and leaned against Edward’s shoulder. We were quiet for a long time. â€Å"How much longer?† I asked. â€Å"Alice told Sam it should be an hour or so,† Edward said, soft and bleak. â€Å"We stay together. No matter what.† â€Å"No matter what,† he agreed, his eyes tight. â€Å"I know,† I said. â€Å"I’m terrified for them, too.† â€Å"They know how to handle themselves,† Edward assured me, purposely making his voice light. â€Å"I just hate missing the fun.† Again with the fun. My nostrils flared. He put his arm around my shoulder. â€Å"Don’t worry,† he urged, and then he kissed my forehead. As if there was any way to avoid that. â€Å"Sure, sure.† â€Å"Do you want me to distract you?† He breathed, running his cold fingers along my cheekbone. I shivered involuntarily; the morning was still frosty. â€Å"Maybe not right now,† he answered himself, pulling his hand away. â€Å"There are other ways to distract me.† â€Å"What would you like?† â€Å"You could tell me about your ten best nights,† I suggested. â€Å"I’m curious.† He laughed. â€Å"Try to guess.† I shook my head. â€Å"There’re too many nights I don’t know about. A century of them.† â€Å"I’ll narrow it down for you. All of my best nights have happened since I met you.† â€Å"Really?† â€Å"Yes, really – and by quite a wide margin, too.† I thought for a minute. â€Å"I can only think of mine,† I admitted. â€Å"They might be the same,† he encouraged. â€Å"Well, there was the first night. The night you stayed.† â€Å"Yes, that’s one of mine, too. Of course, you were unconscious for my favorite part.† â€Å"That’s right,† I remembered. â€Å"I was talking that night, too.† â€Å"Yes,† he agreed. My face got hot as I wondered again what I might have said while sleeping in Jacob’s arms. I couldn’t remember what I’d dreamed about, or if I’d dreamed at all, so that was no help. â€Å"What did I say last night?† I whispered more quietly than before. He shrugged instead of answering, and I winced. â€Å"That bad?† â€Å"Nothing too horrible,† he sighed. â€Å"Please tell me.† â€Å"Mostly you said my name, the same as usual.† â€Å"That’s not bad,† I agreed cautiously. â€Å"Near the end, though, you started mumbling some nonsense about ‘Jacob, my Jacob.'† I could hear the pain, even in the whisper. â€Å"Your Jacob enjoyed that quite a lot.† I stretched my neck up, straining to reach my lips to the edge of his jaw. I couldn’t see into his eyes. He was staring up at the ceiling of the tent. â€Å"Sorry,† I murmured. â€Å"That’s just the way I differentiate.† â€Å"Differentiate?† â€Å"Between Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde. Between the Jacob I like and the one who annoys the hell out of me,† I explained. â€Å"That makes sense.† He sounded slightly mollified. â€Å"Tell me another favorite night.† â€Å"Flying home from Italy.† He frowned. â€Å"Is that not one of yours?† I wondered. â€Å"No, it is one of mine, actually, but I’m surprised it’s on your list. Weren’t you under the ludicrous impression I was just acting from a guilty conscience, and I was going to bolt as soon as the plane doors opened?† â€Å"Yes.† I smiled. â€Å"But, still, you were there.† He kissed my hair. â€Å"You love me more than I deserve.† I laughed at the impossibility of that idea. â€Å"Next would be the night after Italy,† I continued. â€Å"Yes, that’s on the list. You were so funny.† â€Å"Funny?† I objected. â€Å"I had no idea your dreams were so vivid. It took me forever to convince you that you were awake.† â€Å"I’m still not sure,† I muttered. â€Å"You’ve always seemed more like a dream than reality. Tell me one of yours, now. Did I guess your first place?† â€Å"No – that would be two nights ago, when you finally agreed to marry me.† I made a face. â€Å"That doesn’t make your list?† I thought about the way he’d kissed me, the concession I’d gained, and changed my mind. â€Å"Yes . . . it does. But with reservations. I don’t understand why it’s so important to you. You already had me forever.† â€Å"A hundred years from now, when you’ve gained enough perspective to really appreciate the answer, I will explain it to you.† â€Å"I’ll remind you to explain – in a hundred years.† â€Å"Are you warm enough?† he asked suddenly. â€Å"I’m fine,† I assured him. â€Å"Why?† Before he could answer, the silence outside the tent was ripped apart by an earsplitting howl of pain. The sound ricocheted off the bare rock face of the mountain and filled the air so that it seared from every direction. The howl tore through my mind like a tornado, both strange and familiar. Strange because I’d never heard such a tortured cry before. Familiar because I knew the voice at once – I recognized the sound and understood the meaning as perfectly as if I’d uttered it myself. It made no difference that Jacob was not human when he cried out. I needed no translation. Jacob was close. Jacob had heard every word we’d said. Jacob was in agony. The howl choked off into a peculiar gurgled sob, and then it was quiet again. I did not hear his silent escape, but I could feel it – I could feel the absence I had wrongly assumed before, the empty space he left behind. â€Å"Because your space heater has reached his limit,† Edward answered quietly. â€Å"Truce over,† he added, so low I couldn’t be sure that was really what he’d said. â€Å"Jacob was listening,† I whispered. It wasn’t a question. â€Å"Yes.† â€Å"You knew.† â€Å"Yes.† I stared at nothing, seeing nothing. â€Å"I never promised to fight fair,† he reminded me quietly. â€Å"And he deserves to know.† My head fell into my hands. â€Å"Are you angry with me?† he asked. â€Å"Not you,† I whispered. â€Å"I’m horrified at me.† â€Å"Don’t torment yourself,† he pleaded. â€Å"Yes,† I agreed bitterly. â€Å"I should save my energy to torment Jacob some more. I wouldn’t want to leave any part of him unharmed.† â€Å"He knew what he was doing.† â€Å"Do you think that matters?† I was blinking back tears, and this was easy to hear in my voice. â€Å"Do you think I care whether it’s fair or whether he was adequately warned? I’m hurting him. Every time I turn around, I’m hurting him again.† My voice was getting louder, more hysterical. â€Å"I’m a hideous person.† He wrapped his arms tightly around me. â€Å"No, you’re not.† â€Å"I am! What’s wrong with me?† I struggled against his arms, and he let them drop. â€Å"I have to go find him.† â€Å"Bella, he’s already miles away, and it’s cold.† â€Å"I don’t care. I can’t just sit here.† I shrugged off Jacob’s parka, shoved my feet into my boots, and crawled stiffly to the door; my legs felt numb. â€Å"I have to – I have to . . .† I didn’t know how to finishthe sentence, didn’t know what there was to do, but I unzipped the door anyway, and climbed out into the bright, icy morning. There was less snow than I would have thought after the fury of last night’s storm. Probably it had blown away rather than melted in the sun that now shone low in the southeast, glancing off the snow that lingered and stabbing at my unadjusted eyes. The air still had a bite to it, but it was dead calm and slowly becoming more seasonable as the sun rose higher. Seth Clearwater was curled up on a patch of dry pine needles in the shadow of a thick spruce, his head on his paws. His sand-colored fur was almost invisible against the dead needles, but I could see the bright snow reflect off his open eyes. He was staring at me with what I imagined was an accusation. I knew Edward was following me as I stumbled toward the trees. I couldn’t hear him, but the sun reflected off his skin in glittering rainbows that danced ahead of me. He didn’t reach out to stop me until I was several paces into the forest shadows. His hand caught my left wrist. He ignored it when I tried to yank myself free. â€Å"You can’t go after him. Not today. It’s almost time. And getting yourself lost wouldn’t help anyone, regardless.† I twisted my wrist, pulling uselessly. â€Å"I’m sorry, Bella,† he whispered. â€Å"I’m sorry I did that.† â€Å"You didn’t do anything. It’s my fault. I did this. I did everything wrong. I could have . . . When he . . . I shouldn’t have . . . I . . . I . . .† I was sobbing. â€Å"Bella, Bella.† His arms folded around me, and my tears soaked into his shirt. â€Å"I should have – told him – I should – have said -† What? What could have made this right? â€Å"He shouldn’t have – found out like this.† â€Å"Do you want me to see if I can bring him back, so that you can talk to him? There’s still a little time,† Edward murmured, hushed agony in his voice. I nodded into his chest, afraid to see his face. â€Å"Stay by the tent. I’ll be back soon.† His arms disappeared. He left so quickly that, in the second it took me to look up, he was already gone. I was alone. A new sob broke from my chest. I was hurting everyone today. Was there anything I touched that didn’t get spoiled? I didn’t know why it was hitting me so hard now. It wasn’t like I hadn’t known this was coming all along. But Jacob had never reacted so strongly – lost his bold overconfidence and shown the intensity of his pain. The sound of his agony still cut at me, somewhere deep in my chest. Right beside it was the other pain. Pain for feeling pain over Jacob. Pain for hurting Edward, too. For not being able to watch Jacob go with composure, knowing that it was the right thing, the only way. I was selfish, I was hurtful. I tortured the ones I loved. I was like Cathy, like Wuthering Heights, only my options were so much better than hers, neither one evil, neither one weak. And here I sat, crying about it, not doing anything productive to make it right. Just like Cathy. I couldn’t allow what hurt me to influence my decisions anymore. It was too little, much too late, but I had to do what was right now. Maybe it was already done for me. Maybe Edward would not be able to bring him back. And then I would accept that and get on with my life. Edward would never see me shed another tear for Jacob Black. There would be no more tears. I wiped the last of them away with cold fingers now. But if Edward did return with Jacob, that was it. I had to tell him to go away and never come back. Why was that so hard? So very much more difficult than saying goodbye to my other friends, to Angela, to Mike? Why did that hurt? It wasn’t right. That shouldn’t be able to hurt me. I had what I wanted. I couldn’t have them both, because Jacob could not be just my friend. It was time to give up wishing for that. How ridiculously greedy could any one person be? I had to get over this irrational feeling that Jacob belonged in my life. He couldn’t belong with me, could not be my Jacob, when I belonged to someone else. I walked slowly back to the little clearing, my feet dragging. When I broke into the open space, blinking against the sharp light, I threw one quick glance toward Seth – he hadn’t moved from his bed of pine needles – and then looked away, avoiding his eyes. I could feel that my hair was wild, twisted into clumps like Medusa’s snakes. I yanked through it with my fingers, and then gave up quickly. Who cared what I looked like, anyway? I grabbed the canteen hanging beside the tent door and shook it. It sloshed wetly, so I unscrewed the lid and took a swig to rinse my mouth with the ice water. There was food somewhere nearby, but I didn’t feel hungry enough to look for it. I started pacing across the bright little space, feeling Seth’s eyes on me the whole time. Because I wouldn’t look at him, in my head he became the boy again, rather than the gigantic wolf. So much like a younger Jacob. I wanted to ask Seth to bark or give some other sign if Jacob was coming back, but I stopped myself. It didn’t matter if Jacob came back. It might be easier if he didn’t. I wished I had some way to call Edward. Seth whined at that moment, and got to his feet. â€Å"What is it?† I asked him stupidly. He ignored me, trotting to the edge of the trees, and pointing his nose toward the west. He began whimpering. â€Å"Is it the others, Seth?† I demanded. â€Å"In the clearing?† He looked at me and yelped softly once, and then turned his nose alertly back to the west. His ears laid back and he whined again. Why was I such a fool? What was I thinking, sending Edward away? How was I supposed to know what was going on? I didn’t speak wolf. A cold trickle of fear began to ooze down my spine. What if the time had run out? What if Jacob and Edward got too close? What if Edward decided to join in the fight? The icy fear pooled inmy stomach. What if Seth’s distress had nothing to do with the clearing, and his yelp had been a denial? What if Jacob and Edward were fighting with each other, far away somewhere in the forest? They wouldn’t do that, would they? With sudden, chilling certainty I realized that they would – if the wrong words were said. I thought of the tense standoff in the tent this morning, and I wondered if I’d underestimated how close it had come to a fight. It would be no more than I deserved if I somehow lost them both. The ice locked around my heart. Before I could collapse with fear, Seth grumbled slightly, deep in his chest, and then turned away from his watch and sauntered back toward his resting place. It calmed me, but irritated me. Couldn’t he scratch a message in the dirt or something? The pacing was starting to make me sweat under all my layers. I threw my jacket into the tent, and then I went back to wearing a path across the center of the tiny break in the trees. Seth jumped to his feet again suddenly, the hackles on the back of his neck standing up stiffly. I looked around, but saw nothing. If Seth didn’t cut it out, I was going to throw a pinecone at him. He growled, a low warning sound, slinking back toward the western rim, and I rethought my impatience. â€Å"It’s just us, Seth,† Jacob called from a distance. I tried to explain to myself why my heart kicked into fourth gear when I heard him. It was just fear of what I was going to have to do now, that was all. I could not allow myself to be relieved that he’d come back. That would be the opposite of helpful. Edward walked into view first, his face blank and smooth. When he stepped out from the shadows, the sun shimmered on his skin like it did on the snow. Seth went to greet him, looking intently into his eyes. Edward nodded slowly, and worry creased his forehead. â€Å"Yes, that’s all we need,† he muttered to himself before addressing the big wolf. â€Å"I suppose we shouldn’t be surprised. But the timing is going to be very close. Please have Sam ask Alice to try to nail the schedule down better.† Seth dipped his head once, and I wished I was able to growl. Sure, he could nod now. I turned my head, annoyed, and realized that Jacob was there. He had his back to me, facing the way he’d come. I waited warily for him to turn around. â€Å"Bella,† Edward murmured, suddenly right beside me. He stared down at me with nothing but concern showing in his eyes. There was no end to his generosity. I deserved him now less than I ever had. â€Å"There’s a bit of a complication,† he told me, his voice carefully unworried. â€Å"I’m going to take Seth a little ways away and try to straighten it out. I won’t go far, but I won’t listen, either. I know you don’t want an audience, no matter which way you decide to go.† Only at the very end did the pain break into his voice. I had to never hurt him again. That would be my mission in life. Never again would I be the reason for this look to come into his eyes. I was too upset to even ask him what the new problem was. I didn’t need anything else right now. â€Å"Hurry back,† I whispered. He kissed me lightly on the lips, and then disappeared into the forest with Seth at his side. Jacob was still in the shadow of the trees; I couldn’t see his expression clearly. â€Å"I’m in a hurry, Bella,† he said in a dull voice. â€Å"Why don’t you get it over with?† I swallowed, my throat suddenly so dry I wasn’t sure if I could make sound come out. â€Å"Just say the words, and be done with it.† I took a deep breath. â€Å"I’m sorry I’m such a rotten person,† I whispered. â€Å"I’m sorry I’ve been so selfish. I wish I’d never met you, so I couldn’t hurt you the way I have. I won’t do it anymore, I promise. I’ll stay far away from you. I’ll move out of the state. You won’t have to look at me ever again.† â€Å"That’s not much of an apology,† he said bitterly. I couldn’t make my voice louder than a whisper. â€Å"Tell me how to do it right.† â€Å"What if I don’t want you to go away? What if I’d rather you stayed, selfish or not? Don’t I get any say, if you’re trying to make things up to me?† â€Å"That won’t help anything, Jake. It was wrong to stay with you when we wanted such different things. It’s not going to get better. I’ll just keep hurting you. I don’t want to hurt you anymore. I hate it.† My voice broke. He sighed. â€Å"Stop. You don’t have to say anything else. I understand.† I wanted to tell him how much I would miss him, but I bit my tongue. That would not help anything, either. He stood quietly for a moment, staring at the ground, and I fought against the urge to go and put my arms around him. To comfort him. And then his head snapped up. â€Å"Well, you’re not the only one capable of self-sacrifice,† he said, his voice stronger. â€Å"Two can play at that game.† â€Å"What?† â€Å"I’ve behaved pretty badly myself. I’ve made this much harder for you than I needed to. I could have given up with good grace in the beginning. But I hurt you, too.† â€Å"This is my fault.† â€Å"I won’t let you claim all the blame here, Bella. Or all the glory either. I know how to redeem myself.† â€Å"What are you talking about?† I demanded. The sudden, frenzied light in his eyes frightened me. He glanced up at the sun and then smiled at me. â€Å"There’s a pretty serious fight brewing down there. I don’t think it will be that difficult to take myself out of the picture.† His words sank into my brain, slowly, one by one, and I couldn’t breathe. Despite all my intentions to cut Jacob out of mylife completely, I didn’t realize until that precise second exactly how deep the knife would have to go to do it. â€Å"Oh, no, Jake! No, no no no,† I choked out in horror. â€Å"No, Jake, no. Please, no.† My knees began to tremble. â€Å"What’s the difference, Bella? This will only make it more convenient for everyone. You won’t even have to move.† â€Å"No!† My voice got louder. â€Å"No, Jacob! I won’t let you!† â€Å"How will you stop me?† he taunted lightly, smiling to take the sting out of his tone. â€Å"Jacob, I’m begging you. Stay with me.† I would have fallen to my knees, if I could have moved at all. â€Å"For fifteen minutes while I miss a good brawl? So that you can run away from me as soon as you think I’m safe again? You’ve got to be kidding.† â€Å"I won’t run away. I’ve changed my mind. We’ll work something out, Jacob. There’s always a compromise. Don’t go!† â€Å"You’re lying.† â€Å"I’m not. You know what a terrible liar I am. Look in my eyes. I’ll stay if you do.† His face hardened. â€Å"And I can be your best man at the wedding?† It was a moment before I could speak, and still the only answer I could give him was, â€Å"Please.† â€Å"That’s what I thought,† he said, his face going calm again, but for the turbulent light in his eyes. â€Å"I love you, Bella,† he murmured. â€Å"I love you, Jacob,† I whispered brokenly. He smiled. â€Å"I know that better than you do.† He turned to walk away. â€Å"Anything,† I called after him in a strangled voice. â€Å"Anything you want, Jacob. Just don’t do this!† He paused, turning slowly. â€Å"I don’t really think you mean that.† â€Å"Stay,† I begged. He shook his head. â€Å"No, I’m going.† He paused, as if deciding something. â€Å"But I could leave it to fate.† â€Å"What do you mean?† I choked out. â€Å"I don’t have to do anything deliberate – I could just do my best for my pack and let what happens happen.† He shrugged. â€Å"If you could convince me you really did want me to come back – more than you wanted to do the selfless thing.† â€Å"How?† I asked. â€Å"You could ask me,† he suggested. â€Å"Come back,† I whispered. How could he doubt that I meant it? He shook his head, smiling again. â€Å"That’s not what I’m talking about.† It took me a second to grasp what he was saying, and all the while he was looking at me with this superior expression – so sure of my reaction. As soon as the realization hit, though, I blurted out the words without stopping to count the cost. â€Å"Will you kiss me, Jacob?† His eyes widened in surprise, then narrowed suspiciously. â€Å"You’re bluffing.† â€Å"Kiss me, Jacob. Kiss me, and then come back.† He hesitated in the shadow, warring with himself. He half-turned again to the west, his torso twisting away from me while his feet stayed planted where they were. Still looking away, he took one uncertain step in my direction, and then another. He swung his face around to look at me, his eyes doubtful. I stared back. I had no idea what expression was on my face. Jacob rocked back on his heels, and then lurched forward, closing the distance between us in three long strides. I knew he would take advantage of the situation. I expected it. I held very still – my eyes closed, my fingers curled into fists at my sides – as his hands caught my face and his lips found mine with an eagerness that was not far from violence. I could feel his anger as his mouth discovered my passive resistance. One hand moved to the nape of my neck, twisting into a fist around the roots of my hair. The other hand grabbed roughly at my shoulder, shaking me, then dragging me to him. His hand continued down my arm, finding my wrist and pulling my arm up around his neck. I left it there, my hand still tightly balled up, unsure how far I could go in my desperation to keep him alive. All the while his lips, disconcertingly soft and warm, tried to force a response out of mine. As soon as he was sure I wouldn’t drop my arm, he freed my wrist, his hand feeling its way down to my waist. His burning hand found the skin at the small of my back, and he yanked me forward, bowing my body against his. His lips gave up on mine for a moment, but I knew he was nowhere close to finished. His mouth followed the line of my jaw, and then explored the length of my neck. He freed my hair, reaching for my other arm to draw it around his neck like the first. Then both of his arms were constricted around my waist, and his lips found my ear. â€Å"You can do better than this, Bella,† he whispered huskily. â€Å"You’re overthinking it.† I shivered as I felt his teeth graze my earlobe. â€Å"That’s right,† he murmured. â€Å"For once, just let yourself feel what you feel.† I shook my head mechanically until one of his hands wound back into my hair and stopped me. His voice turned acidic. â€Å"Are you sure you want me to come back? Or did you really want me to die?† Anger rocked through me like the whiplash after a heavy punch. That was too much – he wasn’t fighting fair. My arms were already around his neck, so I grabbed two fistfuls of his hair – ignoring the stabbing pain in my right hand – and fought back, struggling to pull my face away from his. And Jacob misunderstood. He was too strong to recognize that my hands, trying to yank his hair out by the roots, meant to cause him pain. Instead of anger, he imagined passion. He thought I was finally responding to him. With a wild gasp, he brought his mouth back to mine, his fingers clutching frantically against the skin at my waist. The jolt of anger unbalanced my tenuous hold on self-control; his unexpected, ecstatic response overthrew it entirely. If there had been only triumph, I might have been able to resist him. But the utter defenselessness of his sudden joy cracked my determination, disabled it. My brain disconnected from my body, and I was kissing him back. Against all reason, my lips were movingwith his in strange, confusing ways they’d never moved before – because I didn’t have to be careful with Jacob, and he certainly wasn’t being careful with me. My fingers tightened in his hair, but I was pulling him closer now. He was everywhere. The piercing sunlight turned my eyelids red, and the color fit, matched the heat. The heat was everywhere. I couldn’t see or hear or feel anything that wasn’t Jacob. The tiny piece of my brain that retained sanity screamed questions at me. Why wasn’t I stopping this? Worse than that, why couldn’t I find inmyself even the desire to want to stop? What did it mean that I didn’t want him to stop? That my hands clung to his shoulders, and liked that they were wide and strong? That his hands pulled me too tight against his body, and yet it was not tight enough for me? The questions were stupid, because I knew the answer: I’d been lying to myself. Jacob was right. He’d been right all along. He was more than just my friend. That’s why it was so impossible to tell him goodbye – because I was in love with him. Too. I loved him, much more than I should, and yet, still nowhere near enough. I was in love with him, but it was not enough to change anything; it was only enough to hurt us both more. To hurt him worse than I ever had. I didn’t care about more than that – than his pain. I more than deserved whatever pain this caused me. I hoped it was bad. I hoped I would really suffer. In this moment, it felt as though we were the same person. His pain had always been and would always be my pain – now his joy was my joy. I felt joy, too, and yet his happiness was somehow also pain. Almost tangible – it burned against my skin like acid, a slow torture. For one brief, never-ending second, an entirely different path expanded behind the lids of my tear-wet eyes. As if I were looking through the filter of Jacob’s thoughts, I could see exactly what I was going to give up, exactly what this new self-knowledge would not save me from losing. I could see Charlie and Rene mixed into a strange collage with Billy and Sam and La Push. I could see years passing, and meaning something as they passed, changing me. I could see the enormous red-brown wolf that I loved, always standing as protector if I needed him. For the tiniest fragment of that second, I saw the bobbing heads of two small, black-haired children, running away from me into the familiar forest. When they disappeared, they took the rest of the vision with them. And then, quite distinctly, I felt the splintering along the fissure line in my heart as the smaller part wrenched itself away from the whole. Jacob’s lips were still before mine were. I opened my eyes and he was staring at me with wonder and elation. â€Å"I have to leave,† he whispered. â€Å"No.† He smiled, pleased by my response. â€Å"I won’t be long,† he promised. â€Å"But one thing first . . .† He bent to kiss me again, and there was no reason to resist. What would be the point? This time was different. His hands were soft on my face and his warm lips were gentle, unexpectedly hesitant. It was brief, and very, very sweet. His arms curled around me, and he hugged me securely while he whispered in my ear. â€Å"That should have been our first kiss. Better late than never.† Against his chest, where he couldn’t see, the tears welled up and spilled over. How to cite The Twilight Saga 3: Eclipse Chapter 23. MONSTER, Essay examples

Thursday, December 5, 2019

What makes film Essay Example For Students

What makes film? Essay Just before the making of the film there was political and social debates serounding the popularity of drugs. With the release of this film there then were even larger debates resulting in a cultural shift of attitudes towards drugs and how they are represented. Film has a large influence over our personal cultural interpretations of certain spaces and times etc. For example I personally have never been to America. But through the representation of the back streets of neglected area in central America cities found in the film Seven i would aviod these area if i were ever to be in America. Culturally there are represented and dark, shown specifically through the night for night shooting, lonely, represented throught Morgan Freemans character. Opening shots of him show him to be a lone and isolated furthermore he even goes on to admitt to Mills (Brad Pitt) that he cannot wait to leave this city. The whole Culture of the film is predominatly represented however simply by the genre. Immediatly the audience are aware of the type of culture they are going to be shown through the film being labelled as a thrillar. However i personally therefore could be labelled as nieve, because culture and the way it is represented is linked very strangly to myth. The film seven acted out to me what I would have thought these areas of America to be like, therefore satisfings my viewing needs. But that representation of those areas could be completely wrong. But the media has to play on myths to sell films, televisons shows etc to the audience. If the film would have shown those areas to be clean, frindly and safe i therefore may not have been convienced by the narrative and the film would not have impressed me, there perspective target audience. Film is a popular culture form. It offers the audience a chance to escape the culture that they actually do live in. For example the matrix allows its audince to escape the mundaity of life and enter and whole differnt dimention in which the culture which they do live in comes into question. The success of this film then was reflected back into society through such things as the way people dressed dirctly after it: Leather jackets were seen to be a fashionale item rather then a past time of what is socially acceptable to wear.

Thursday, November 28, 2019

Teaming and real world situations

Abstract An organization involves the act of bringing together all the efforts or the work done by individuals or different groups using the available facilities so that the desired outcomes which are the goals set may be met efficiently. The goal of every organization is to attain a certain common purpose with maximum benefits.Advertising We will write a custom essay sample on Teaming and real world situations specifically for you for only $16.05 $11/page Learn More For this common purpose to be attained, there needs to be a model of each individual or group that has a role to play in an organization to ensure that the organizations goals are attained. This means that each individual or different group is to be assigned different tasks of which if brought together will result in achievements. However, there needs to be management teams that have the mandate to oversee and give direction to the other junior teams so that there is an order in their perfor mances. These management teams need are supposed bring together any resources that are required. Introduction To explain the topic under study, sporting teams were considered for the essay because in sporting teams various functional groups are involved. Sporting teams are similar to management teams as they have authoritative figures who are charged with the mandate of setting targets for the whole team. A general manager who is the head of a management team executes the goals of a team and for the manager to perform his duties; he has to work closely with the technical bench of the team to ensure that the goals and objectives of the team have been achieved. The various teams that exist in the real world will be discussed in the following section. Teaming and Real World Situations In the consideration of one sporting team, which is football, the instructions given by the coach are meant to be transformed into actions. The players are divided into various groups that include the def ense, the midfield, and the strikers. The defense is supposed to prevent the opponents from scoring by creating a barrier at the back close to the target. These groups of players rarely play beyond the half field marked for them. The goalkeeper is among this group and his work is ensure that the ball does not go between the cross bar (Bronstein et al, 2010).Advertising Looking for essay on psychology? Let's see if we can help you! Get your first paper with 15% OFF Learn More Once the ball is with the goalkeeper, he kicks the ball out to the field targeting his teammate who is meant to ensure that despite the opponent’s presence or tackle, he has to posses the ball. This player is then supposed to control the ball and safely deliver it to his other teammate. The teammate is then required to do the same with the ball. This task is usually done by midfielders who are trying to ensure that the ball reaches the strikers. Once the ball reaches the strikers, their work is to score and nothing less than that is expected from them. As the strikers take the ball, they are supposed to target the scoring point. If they fail to score then almost a quarter of the team is supposed to retreat back to their side to avoid the opponents from scoring. Mostly the strikers remain forward to wait for the ball in the event that they reposes the ball from their defense area. This means that they have to play in a synchronized network for them to score. This is a typical example of a sporting team that functions well (Bronstein et al, 2010). In a basketball team, the team comprises of managers who have to set team goals and targets that are mostly executed by the general manager. The general manager has to ensure that the coach and the players achieve the expected results by working on the necessary requirements. The basketball team has a technical bench that is headed by a coach and an assistant coach. They give different opinions and advice with regards to game s trategy and defense to the basketball players. In the basketball pitch, the players play as a team of five who are divided and assigned various positions. The positions are categorized as the defensive and offensive positions. The defensive positions are further divided as point guard and shooting guard. The offensive is divided as small forward and power forward (Legh Maynard, 2008). The defensive players consist of the players that play to guard their opponents from scoring. Offensive players are charged with the responsibility of moving the ball within the basketball field. This group of players has passes that are planned and in most cases, the players may move even without the ball so that they gain an advantageous position to handle the ball. They are also supposed to mark the opposing teammate so that they can navigate the ball whenever it is passed to them. For the ball to move from the defensive area until it is scored in the opponent’s basket, it has to move throug h the field with the players trying as much as possible to ensure that the ball is not intercepted by the opponents.Advertising We will write a custom essay sample on Teaming and real world situations specifically for you for only $16.05 $11/page Learn More However if the opponents intercept the ball, the defensive players are supposed to stop the opponents from scoring. In the event that the coach realizes a loophole where the team is at a risk of losing, he requests the referee for a time out so that he can organize his team well. The players are then expected to change for the better according to the advice given by the technical bench (Legh Maynard, 2008). In the American football team, there are eleven players on every side but they can be allowed to play fewer than the number required but they will be disqualified if they are more. This team has eleven players on the offensive side and eleven players on the defensive side. There may be times when three or more players might play on the defensive side and on the offensive side. There are always players meant for reserve and they usually do not play at the beginning of the game. These players are not listed among the twenty-two players in the lineup. Most of these reserve players are specialists. The team that has the ball is called the offensive team and their opponents are called the defensive team (Legh Maynard, 2008). The offensive team usually has only four attempts and if they fail to succeed in any of the four attempts, their opponents are given the possession of the ball immediately after the fourth attempt. These opponents then begin their advancement in their opponent’s direction which was initially the offender’s during the time the ball was being played by a snap. The defensive players and offensive players do a face lineup facing their opponents and for the game to start, the centre player has to snap the ball to a teammate backwards by passing it between their legs. The offensive players then pass the ball to ensure that it advances towards the team’s opponents. This is done in a forward manner only. The offensive player is then tackled by the opponents who force him down to the ground. This is the process of trying to achieve draw or score (Legh Maynard, 2008). When we consider music for instance a music band, for the flow, the theme, and the entertainment in the presentation to be given, there has to be various members of the team who have to bring their talents and understanding so that the goal is met. In a musical team, there are those who are supposed to sing in their voices and there are those that are supposed to play the instruments to give the entertainment value of the song.Advertising Looking for essay on psychology? Let's see if we can help you! Get your first paper with 15% OFF Learn More This means that every person in the team has a role to play that is different from the other members of the band but they all want to achieve one goal, which is, to entertain the audience. The instrumental team usually comprises of people that play the guitar, keyboard, flute, drum, and many other instruments that are used in musical bands. This group usually has a leader that issues instructions to the other band members on what to do. This is because there has to be a sequence of how the tune is meant to be performed (Gibson, 2006). The soloists in a musical group are usually employed to pass out a message through the use of their voices. This group leads another group that is called the backup singers. In the backup, there is always a categorization of different voices which when mixed or sung in alternate voices, gives the audience a taste of the song. This comprises of the various voices that exist in a choir which include bass, tenor, alto and the soprano. These voices sing th e song with a certain sequence to give a smooth flow of the song. It therefore means that in each group of the musical team, there needs to be the harmonious bringing together of different individuals who have different functions to perform within the team to ensure that the team’s goal is met (Gibson, 2006). A consideration will also be done on the scientific teams that manage the ground data system required to carry out all the developmental aspects of ground systems in the TES which include the scientific facilities that compute data and the processing systems that use LED technology in scientific data processing labs. For all this work to be done successfully, the team that executes these jobs is made up of a configuration manager, SIPS operator, a data base administrator, project element manager in the processing system that uses LED technology, software engineer, project manager, system administrators. Each of these individuals have their own specific role to play that the other is not specialized in. This means that each member of the team needs the other so that the set goals and targets can be achieved (Gibson, 2006). Another typical place where a model organizational structure is seen is in the operating room where a patient is undergoing an operation. This team consists of the surgical members who include the surgeon, his assistants, and the scrub person whose function is to carry out the sterilization of the theater. The surgeon diagnoses and performs the surgery and manages the care of the patient. The assistant surgeon helps the surgeon to maintain the cleanliness of the surgery theatre by controlling the patients bleeding and also ensuring that their wounds are properly dressed. The scrub person makes sure that the place for surgery is properly sterilized to avoid contamination of the patient’s wounds (Bronstein et al, 2010). The other surgical group consists of an anesthesiologist who ensures that the patient is unconscious as the surgery is being performed and that the patient can be able to regain consciousness once the surgery has been completed. Biomedical technicians, radiologists and circulators usually monitor the performance of the patient during the surgery process. This therefore means that for the operation to be successful there has to be a combination of efforts from the different specialists during the surgical operation. This demonstrates a model of an organizational team in the real world situation according to Bronstein et al (2010). References Bronstein, M., Michael, C. D., Peter, E. (2010). Thriving in the work place: All in one  For Dummies. Indiana: Wiley Publishing Inc. Gibson, J. L. (2006). Organizations: Behavior, structure, processes. 12th Edition. Chicago: McGraw-Hill Publishers. Legh, A., Maynard, M. (2008). Leading your team. Boston: Nicholas Brealey Publishing. This essay on Teaming and real world situations was written and submitted by user Javon Rojas to help you with your own studies. You are free to use it for research and reference purposes in order to write your own paper; however, you must cite it accordingly. You can donate your paper here.

Monday, November 25, 2019

Finding my place in society essays

Finding my place in society essays Can one just imagine the pain and suffering a young poor African American boy in the 1920s had to go through? No one can. Just because the color of ones skin is different does not mean that their different on the in side. The book Black Boy by Richard Wright ( 1937) is about him self, like an autobiography. It is about all the troubles he went through as a young boy, and all the pain he had to face being of a different color. The book takes place it the 1920s-1930s era, and in different areas of the South. As a young boy, Richard was always curious of the world around him and he always got in trouble. One day Richard ¡s dad leaves him, his brother, and his mom 'cause he got fed up with them. So Richard ¡s mom thought it would be best for them to move in with their grandmother. Throughout the time period Richard discovers alcohol and gets in to fights, but he starts to go to school. He wants to be educated and to do some thing with his life, and not accept his expected roll in life. Richard ¡s expected roll in life is to be a nothing, a nobody and to never succeed in any thing. One of societies expectations for Richard is to be a nothing, a nobody. All of Richard ¡s childhood, he was always let down and discouraged.  ¡...I use to mull over the strange absence of real kindness in Negroes, how unstable was our tenderness, how lacking in genuine passion we were, how void of great hope, how timid our joy, how bare our traditions, how lacking we were in those intangible sentiments that bind man to man, and how shallow was even our despair... ¡ (45) This explains how the way of society has got Richard feeling down, and how empty his world felt to him. He always felt like there was something missing, or he was out of place. But with being a nothing there is no To never succeed in anything is an easy accomplis ...

Thursday, November 21, 2019

B2B Marketing Assignment Example | Topics and Well Written Essays - 2500 words

B2B Marketing - Assignment Example suppliers management quality and timely supply of materials to C4U. Card for you (C4U) is a small to medium sized UK firm manufacturing greeting cards. Since its establishment in 1990, C4U with its 50 employee producing silk embroidered designed mounted hand made card. C4U is marketing its products with notion of personal touch and setting its cards apart from other card manufacturers. Due to specialize products positioning C4U charged customers almost double the cost in comparison to other card makers. Consumers see this price as good value for money. Consumers are mostly from middle class. Though C4U turnover has increased, its only in the last year down turn in sales make its promoters to think about its functioning. Company uses sales agent on commission basis to contact with retailers and having different types of retail outlets. It uses exhibitions and events for promotion. Raw materials are purchased locally and labour force is also local and unskilled. C4U sometimes faces problems of supply in short notice. Card market condition of UK is get ting saturated. So in near future C4U has to device certain strategies to improve sales. They have to think about consumers and intermediaries and work on different options like customer segments, product range, channel management, marketing communication polices, the way competitors device their strategies, supply chain management and finally the overall marketing system. Creating A Value Network: Value network is a system of partnership and alliances that a firm creates to source, augment and deliver its offering (Kotler, 2003). The value network perspective yields several insights. First, a company can estimate whether more money is made upstream or down stream, second it is more aware of disturbances anywhere in the supply-chain that might cause costs process or supplies to change suddenly and third, value network partners can link through technology for faster, less costly and more accurate communications, transactions and payments. (Adapted from, Hemil, Jukka. Information technologies for value network integration. Espoo 2002. VTT Tiedotteita -Research Notes 2149. 97 p. + app. 1 p.) Accessed from website http://www.vtt.fi/inf/pdf/tiedotteet/2002/T2149.pdf. The picture shows that how at the different level core company has been integrated to supply chain management and customer relation management. Technologies have enabled the companies to integrate effectively and efficiently. Most producers do not sell directly to the final users. Marketing Channels Between producers and customers stands a set of intermediaries that perform various functions; these intermediaries constitute marketing channels, set of interdependent organizations involved in the process of making a product or service available, for use or consumption (Stern & El-Ansary, 1996). Marketing channels have different levels as shown in the fig. i.e. number of intermediaries varies in different types of channels. Levels of marketing channels Accessed from the website http://www.upe.ac.za/documents/busman/SU10.pdf Marketing channel decisions are among the most critical decisions, which have to be faced by management, because the chosen channels intimately affect all the other marketing decisions. Corey (1991; Ch. 5) observed; "a distribution system is a key external resource. Normally it takes years to build, advertisement